Next to you
by Genora Loe
Summary: Azula has completely lost control. It can't go on like this forever and Zuko has to decide in a council what to do about her, while he can always count on Katara. (Zutara, no Mai)


**Next to ****you**

'Zuko?' I whispered, so he knew I was here. He looked a bit startled behind him. Even through the startled look, I didn't miss the sad look in his eyes. It broke my heart, but I tried to hide it. I knew him well enough. The last thing he wanted right now was compassion. 'It's time. They're all waiting for you.'

Zuko looked in front of him again and brushed his hand through his hair. It was messier than ever. I saw now he had been looking at the turtle ducks, just like he always did when he felt the need for his mom the most. He had never told me that was the reason, but I knew well enough how it felt to have no mom to count on to understand. He nodded slowly and then turned around with a sigh. When he passed me, I grabbed his hand and pinchedslightly. 'You'll find her,' I whispered, 'Your dad will realize soon enough the knowledge where she is isn't the only reason you're keeping him alive.'

He stopped to look at me. His eyes were filled with tension. 'I bet he will,' he grumbled, 'But it's not him I'm worried about today. It's Azula.' He pulled his hand free and walked on to the council room, with me behind him. Just before we were about to enter, he turned around and hold my head between his soft hands to kiss my forehead. 'I'm sorry, I didn't mean to be so rude,' he whispered.

I nodded. 'I understand.'

Everyone grew silent as we entered the room. Zuko seated himself in the middle one of the three seats in the front. I smiled politely at Aang, who sat on the chair on the left, and then seated myself on the right of Zuko. I always felt so proud when we sat there. Not because of the powerful feeling, but just because of sitting there, next to Zuko. I was proud to be his wife, and it was just a great feeling everyone had accepted me as their Princess of the Fire Nation.

'You all know why you're here,' Zuko began as I sat. 'We have to decide what to do about Azula.'

As if it was possible, it seemed to me the room grew even more quiet. I realized Zuko always said her name, I had never heard him saying 'my sister'. Maybe he tried to make everyone forget she was his sister by that, but I doubted he would ever think that was possible.

'In contrast to my father, who has behaved very well in prison so far, she seems to have lost control and hits and kicks everything in her reach. The guards say she screams all day long, 'till her voice is gone. If she's got it back, it all starts over again. They also told me she seems to have a death wish. She has tried to commit suicide more than once, but got caught and failed every time. Since she needs so much attention of the guards and doctors, who're getting mad at their turn, we've decided this can't go on like this and we'll have to make a decision what we should do about her.'

After he spoke, Zuko didn't sigh, blink nor move. He even barely seem to breathe. I wanted to pull him out of this room to comfort him and make Aang lead this council. I knew he felt obligated to fulfill his role as Fire Lord, but I wished there was a way to ensure him no-one was really going to point a finger at him if he didn't lead this council. They would understand it was very hard to talk about your sister and decide what to do about her in this way. Because even if he tried to make us forget that, she still was, and would always be.

'Uncle Iroh,' Zuko eventually said, 'I've known you for a very long time now and I trust you completely, so I ask you first: have you something to say about this case?'

Iroh smiled at him. It was a polite smile, but there was also something heartbreaking inside. 'Like you said, we do know each other very well, so I think you already know what I am going to say.' He paused for a while, and his smile slowly disappeared. 'But I would like to say something else first: she is your sister. Whatever we all say here in this room, it is and will always be you who has to make this decision. All we can do, is give you an opinion, and maybe advise.'

Zuko tightened his hold on the chair. 'And can I ask what your opinion is, then?'

Iroh's smile was there again. 'I still believe there is a way to cure her. There is no problem that can't be solved with love. I know you think you have already tried every possible way to give her a normal life back, but have you already tried to communicate with her yourself? If you talk to her and tell her how you feel about this, there is still a chance that, maybe if in long-term, she could respond.'

Almost everyone in the room watched him with disbelief. Only Aang smiled politely and nodded fully convinced. I looked compassionately at Zuko. His knuckles were completely white of his tight hold to his chair and his face wasn't much more colored either. 'Thank you, uncle,' he eventually managed to say. 'Head of the Earth Kindom?'

The Head was a man from around eighty with short grey hair who stood in one of the dark corners of the room. He was as like a shadow which rose from out of the darkness. 'I guess I must apologize, Your Highness, but my opinion seems to be a very different one from your uncle's. I think this Azula is a danger for this new world. There is no place for her here, in this new community. I think it's the best for everyone to forget her. Put her in your deepest dungeon and only go there for bringing food. No-one will ever be bothered by her again.'

This time it was me who lost all color of the face.

Zuko swallowed**. **'Head of the Water Tribes?'

The Head of the Water Tribes rose to her feet and looked straight at Zuko. 'I seriously do not agreewith him. The new social relationships you are stimulating and the vision of a world without war, are indeed no good business with her, but people won't forget her so easily. Your goals won't be plausibleanymoreif you already give up at trying to cure the Fire Lord's sister. If she is such a, I must excuse for my language, crazy and hatefulperson, they will think you yourself are that as well, Your Highness. Especially if you put her away to rot in a cell.'

Zuko nodded thoughtfully. 'Thank you.' He turned his head to Aang. 'What about you?'

Aang smiled a little in shyness. He still wasn't used to talk in formal occasions like this. I winked to encourage him, but he didn't see it. 'Just like your uncle, I think you know me well enough to know what I'll say. I'm not someone who would even put someone in a cell and will always go for the peaceful solution. I know I've told you before I've already tried every possible way to give her a normal life in this community, and that even the Spirits don't know what to do about her, but by saying that, I didn't mean to discourage you. After all, the Spirits also didn't know how to remove someone's bending ability. I'm very sure somewhere in this world there is someone who can help you with this. Send every guard in the Kingdom to search that person. People who can't help, won't judge you for asking, and will maybe even have respect for you or be inspired never to give up or lose hope.'

'Thanks, Aang.' Zuko said. I was still thinking about what Aang had said, so didn't realize he turned his head at me. Until now. 'And what about you, Katara?'

My heart beat wildly. He wanted my opinion? I hadn't expected he would ask that from me this time, and when he had asked the Head of the Water Tribes, I had even been very sure he wouldn't. It wasn't the problem I didn't have an opinion, but the problem was that I didn't think he was going to like it. I didn't even like it myself. 'Eh… I think I have to admit don't agree with none of the previous opinions.'

I had everyone's attention, Zuko inclusive. The thoughtful, worrying expression which had been on his face for the last few days was now gone and was replaced by interest. 'Tell me,' he said softly.

Now it was me who was afraid to give my opinion and Aang the one to wink at me. I cleared my throat. 'I know you have spent a lot of time with her, so the solution of talking with her won't exactly work, will it? And I think the solution of the council of the Earth Kingdom was a bit rude. Hiding her from everyone will only make it worse.' I paused, and then whispered, so only Zuko could hear me. 'Especially for you.' Then I went back on in normal speaking volume. 'Then, Aang, I'm very sorry, because I know how much you want to solve everything in a peaceful way, but the search for a medicine or another way to cure her mind, will in my opinion take a long time, and the problem will just drag along forever and deteriorate. I also think no-one will ever see Zuko as a bad person who gives up on his sister and is as hatefulas her. I mean, he had fought her, and then ended the Great War. Would a bad person ever do that?'

There was a short moment of complete silence in which everyone seemed to see my point. Then Zuko spoke again. 'So what would you do, then?

I sighed deeply. 'She doesn't like to be like this herself as well. Don't you remember what she was used to be like? What a fierce, not easily scared woman she was? She wanted to die and to be remembered like that, I'm sure. Not like a crazy girl who pulled out her own hair and lost her mind so her enemies had to search a solution to cure her. I'm sorry to say this, Zuko, but she would be so angry of you if she knew about this.' Zuko smiled at this. By that I found the courage again to go on**. **I breathed in deeply and finished: 'And this fierce woman has already found her solution herself: She has a deathwish, you told us.'

After all those previous silences, this one was the worst. The only sound you could still hear, were the startled, raspy breathings.

'You want to let her die?' Zuko asked softly. It was one of the first times he couldn't hide the emotions from his voice.

My heart broke in two. I looked at the floor and nodded. 'Yes,' I whispered, 'Make her last wish come true.'

Zuko remained silent after this and thought about it for a while. I watched the expressions in the room: disbelief, confusion, disappointment, sadness, anger, regard, surprise… Everyone responded differently at my speech. Only Zuko's face I couldn't describe. He was still busy over thinking my opinion and as after a while everyone started whispering and complaining, he was with his mind with us again. 'Has anyone someobjectionat this?' he asked demandingly.

Silence. Again. Everyone looked at each other and didn't dare to say anything. 'No one?' Zuko asked, he still got no response. I could see this was very hard for Aang, but he must have known there was no other direct solution. 'Okay, then I dismiss you all. Azula will be brought to death tomorrow morning. If you've still got something to say, better do it before then.'

I couldn't believe my ears. He had chosen my solution? One after another rose and left the room. Aang nodded at me and then left as well, so Zuko and I remained alone. I came out of my chair and walked toward him. He pulled me onto his lap and began playing with my hair while being deep in thoughts. I laid my head against his muscled –but still soft- shoulder and brought my hand to his cheek, where I started drawing lines from his chin to his forehead and back to his lips with my index finger. When his golden eyes met mine, we watched each other for a long time.

'I'm sorry for you,' I whispered.

Zuko shook his head a little. 'You're right. It's the right thing to do. I'm sure everyone knows that. You were just the only one brave enough to say it out loud.'

My feeling of guild slowly faded away. 'You're a good Fire Lord, your mom would be so proud of you.'

'In the Earth Kingdom, they say behind every good King is an even better Queen.' Zuko smiled softly and pinched my hand.

I couldn't help smiling as well. 'I love you.'

'Love you too', he closed his eye and leaned his head on mine. 'I'll need you tomorrow morning.'

I breathed in slowly and closed my eyes as well. 'I'll be right next to you.'


End file.
